One or both spouses will have to deal with real or perceived comparisons with “former lovers” and feeling that intimacy was not important enough for the other person to wait for it. But if both have waited for their wedding night, the intimacy has already begun with a solid foundation.
Why save sex for marriage? We’ve discussed several reasons: (1) God commands us to, (2) God’s purpose and design for sex can only be achieved within marriage, and (3) the physical and relational consequences of sex outside of marriage are painfully real.
“But we’re in love!” some might say. Maybe so, but if one believes in God’s definition of love, he must realize that love is patient and kind; it does not seek to please itself, nor does it delight in evil, but is always hopeful (1 Corinthians 13). True love would be patient in waiting for the proper time for sex.
It would be kind to future spouses by not pre-harming marital intimacy. True love would be unselfish in placing God’s desires and the needs of others above itself. It would not delight in the evil of disobedience, nor would it force another to disobey God. Love could never be a reason for premarital sex; rather, it should be one of the greatest reasons to avoid premarital sex.
“But we’re going to be married anyway” is another common excuse. Along with being presumptuous, this stance will almost certainly leave one question unanswered: If one gives in to moral temptation before marriage, what’s to stop him or her from giving in to moral temptation once married?
Good question! Certainly a person cannot reverse the past, but there are a number of steps one should take to keep from further damaging his or her intimacy with God and others.
First, acknowledge your actions as sin. For those who have accepted Christ’s payment of the penalty for their sins, He asks only that they confess – agree with God that they are sinful.
Second, maintain purity from this moment forward. Jesus told the woman caught in sexual sin to “go and sin no more” (John 8:11). You cannot change what’s been done, but you can keep yourself and others from any further damage by avoiding situations which might cause you to compromise your commitment to sexual purity. Paul advised https://besthookupwebsites.org/sugar-daddies-usa/fl/jacksonville/ Timothy to run away from temptation (2 Timothy 2:22), and Joous for running from moral danger (Genesis 39:7-12).
Third, be honest with anyone who is a “potential spouse” – don’t wait till your wedding night to discuss your sexual past. Some intimacy problems may be averted if you address them early on.
Similarly, if a person has not carried sexual purity into marriage, his or her marriage relationship is affected by the past
Sex is a good thing. It must be, if God created it! The only way to keep it a “good thing” is to follow God’s guidelines. God will reward you if you choose to honor Him, and save sex for its proper time and place – your marriage.
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ANSWERS TO COMMON QUESTIONS
- For a follower of Christ, what is LOVE-a feeling, an emotion, or an action? Answer
- TRUE LOVE-What is true love and how do you know when you have found it? Answer
- What is SEXUAL IMMORALITY?
